Fuck Me Jesus

An unfortunate journey
Through a bleak sea of
loneliness
I carved through the waves
of grief
In a black vastness of self
doubt
I have never felt so alone
So pitiful and wretched
and low
I'm tried by a terrible wind
The misery and the pains
blow
Fill my vast sails of ruin
Steer me toward a bleak end
A horizon of purples and
reds
The still waters of my
welcome end
The clouds of grey come
overhead
A storm will hunt me down
And rip the guts out of my
body
That I would surely drown
The unforgiving wind
searches
And lashes me like a whip
The self-pity overwhelms me
My heart sinks like a ship
Thrashing out at torment
and pain
The maddened sea engulfs
me
I let myself be swallowed up
The magnificent weight
upon me
Deeper i go, deeper down
Didn't think it could get any
blacker
The cold bites, the pressure
builds
I think i no longer matter
Can't tell if my eyes are open
or closed
The grieving waters swallow
The pain I'm in through my
life of sin
The Devil will doubtless
follow
Loneliness is agony
For those of you who know
A war of grief and sadness
rages
Through mind, body and
soul
When lovers die and
friendships fade
When kin all lie forgotten
The gates of agony spew
forth
Your memories, stinking
and rotten
So deep now i feel so numb
I'm ravaged by utter loss
The guilt, the grief, the
astounding pain
My body, they all will wash
I hope I ne'er return to life
Oh, Christ just let me go
Let death devour my Simple
soul
Lest my misery grow
I quietly leave. A lonely sight
Relieved of all my guilt
To join a wall of deepest
Hell
The Devil himself has built.